January has been a struggle, I have not been eating as healthily as I should, and my exercise regime has been hit and miss. I feel like a failure, but I’m trying not to dwell on that.
Day 19 – Friday 19th January
Weight 214.1 lbs (15 stone 4.1 pounds)
I stepped on the scale for the first time in days, I can’t say I’m surprised to have gained over 2 lbs, I’m actually shocked it’s not more!
Needless to say, I was glad that I went on the ergo last night, I felt pretty good afterwards and managed 50 minutes. I also achieved this badge:
So basically days 11-17 have been a complete right off. I don’t know what got into me, but I’ve been deeply depressed for almost a week.
I woke up on Monday morning a little hungover (whoops) and just couldn’t face work, it’s not that I felt too ill, I just couldn’t stand to be in the office. Fast forward four days, and I’m still sitting at home in my pyjamas trying to figure out where it all went wrong.
I’m trying not to dwell on the fact that I’m a complete fuck-up with self-destructive tendencies, but it’s hard.
I’m going to try and mentally prepare myself for going back to work tomorrow. I’m also going to get an erg session in later; this may help to clear my head a little.
Day 8 – Monday 8th January
Row – 40 mins
Weight 213 lbs (15 stone 3 pounds)
I was pleased that I managed to row for 55 minutes in one workout, I could only manage 15 minutes the first time I got on the erg. I’ve been trying to focus on my technique, this means my strokes per minute have decreased, but I realise it’s important to get your form right first. I’ve noticed when I get tired I get sloppy, and my technique suffers. I need to try and maintain concentration while I’m on the erg, but my mind tends to wander.
I’m really glad I decided to get an ergo, exercising at home is key for me, especially in the winter. There is no way I’d do a full day at work and then have the motivation to drive to the gym. The more I think about the gym, the more I realise I hate that fucking place. I just want to do my own thing without every fucker else watching me.
I’m looking forward to getting into shape so that I can get back on my bike. I can’t wait, I used to love cycling, I hope I can get back to that stage again. I need to lose enough weight so I can fit into my lycra, they were getting tight when I was 12 stone let alone now.
Day 9 – Tuesday 9th January
Weight 212.3 lbs (15 stone 2.3)
Row – 40 mins
I’ve lost a further 0.7 lbs since yesterday; I’m glad the figure is still moving down, I hope this continues. I’d really like to see the 14 stone mark at some point this week. I was 14 stone 7 lbs when I started my new job (last April) this is my first target. I’ll be so pleased when I reach this weight.
The erg was hard last night. I found it difficult to get going, I felt knackered after 10 minutes, but I made myself stay on there for 40. I need to keep plugging away. As someone on the Concept 2 forum said, ‘slow and steady wins the race’.
slow and steady wins the race
I’ve managed to do four days erging in a row – no pun intended. I did another 40 minutes when I got home from work. I could have easily convinced myself to give it a miss, but I forced myself. I need to keep forcing myself and making exercise a habit. It will hurt less if I keep going. I’ve already improved since that first day; I don’t ache as much anymore. I need to look at the positives an stop being so down on myself. This is pretty hard for an eternal pessimist.
Day 10 – Wednesday 10th January
Weight 212.8 lbs (15 stone 2.8)
Row – 45
Pretty disappointed to have gained 0.5 lbs today, especially after (mainly) sticking to my diet and exercising daily. I don’t want to get disheartened, but it’s hard not to when you’re trying to do everything right and then you see the scales going in the wrong direction.
I know when I get home I’m not going to feel like exercising, it’s inevitable considering how depressed I feel right now. I’m determined to get on the erg; I’m sure it will help clear my head and hopefully tire me out for a good nights sleep.
I managed 45 minutes on the erg; I’m glad I went on and didn’t talk myself out of it. Doing something is better than nothing.
Day 4 – Thursday 4th January
Weight 215.7 lbs (15 stone 5.7 pounds)
Row – 30 mins
Really happy to see the scales shift in the right direction, I have lost 4.1 lbs since yesterday, no doubt this is all water weight.
My ergo (Concept 2 Rower) arrived today, so I can finally start exercising. It was a piece of piss to assemble, unlike the Viavalto, which was a complete pain in the arse. I’m very impressed with the build of the machine; it’s a top-notch piece of kit.
Day 5 – Friday 5th January
Weight 215.0 lbs (15 stone 5 pounds)
Row – 0 mins
Not a massive weight loss this morning but at least we are still going in the right direction, I lost 0.7 lbs.
When my alarm went off at 4:30 am, I knew I wouldn’t be able to get up and do my first-morning row. I hadn’t slept very well, and my entire body ached from the night before. I was disappointed in myself, but I thought it would probably be best to ease myself into things gently. I can’t even remember the last time I worked-out, it could have been four years ago…
Everyone has been discussing the health checks at work, I couldn’t face going for one. I didn’t need to be told that I was six stone overweight and probably at death’s door, I’d figured that one out for myself. Maybe I’ll go the next time around if I’m in better shape.
Before Christmas I bought some jeans that almost fit me, I can get in them now. When I put them on to go to my sister-in-laws I was chuffed that I didn’t have to show up in my jogging bottoms (pretty much the only non-work clothes that fit me at the moment).
I told my sister-in-law that I’d bought an ergo and she was very enthusiastic for me, it was nice to hear, I needed a little encouragement, rather than disapproval and ambivalence.
Day 6 – Saturday 6th January
Weight 214.6 lbs (15 stone 4.6 pounds)
Row – 45 mins
Despite having a couple of gin and tonics I was pleased to still that I’d still managed to shift 0.4 lbs.
I’ve been on my diet for six days, and I’ve lost just over 5lbs, the majority of this will be water weight, but I’m still happy to see the scales going in the right direction. So as of today, I have had two rowing sessions that total 75 minutes, I did 45 of them today. Unfortunately, I’ve pulled the back of my knee; I hope this doesn’t stop me from rowing.
Day 7 – Sunday 7th January
Weight 213.4 lbs (15 stone 3.4 pounds)
Row – 55 mins
Happy to get on the scales this morning and see I’ve dropped 1.2 lbs since yesterday, it’s very motivating to see losses every day.
Day 1 – Monday 1st January
My first day back on the low carb diet, I didn’t weigh myself because I didn’t get home until around mid-day and I was worried about all the shite I ate on New Year’s Eve.
Day 2 – Tuesday 2nd January
I actually forgot to weigh myself…
Day 3 – Wednesday 3rd January
Weight 219.8 lbs (15 stone 9.8 pounds)
So I finally stepped on the scales today, I weigh a staggering 219.8 lbs, this is the most I have ever weighed, and I’m thoroughly disgusted with myself.
Signed up for “The Haul” challenge on the Concept 2 website. I’ve committed to row for 15 hours in January! I also joined the Concept 2 forum so I can chat with other rowers.
It seems like such a cliche to start off the new year on a health kick and a commitment to numerous resolutions that never last beyond the end of January, but that is exactly what I’ve done. There are some people that don’t believe in resolutions when they want to make a change; they make a change, it doesn’t matter what time of year it is.
For me, January is a time to make a clean break and focus on making some changes. It seems like 2017 was one false start after another, trying to make changes but failing at the first hurdle.
My main focus for this year is to lose weight, I currently weigh more than I have ever weighed in my entire life, and that’s fucking scary.
Christmas was one long binge of food and drink, basically two whole weeks of shameless overindulgence.I was so worried about seeing my extended family over Christmas; I was worried that some less tactful family members would mention my weight gain (as per the year before when I told that I’d “plonked weight on”.
New Years Resolutions 2018
- Lose weight, get down to 10 stone 7 pounds at least!
- Attend a meet-up I’ve been putting off
- Exercise 5-6 times per week
- Cut down on alcohol massively
- Attempt a carb-free diet
- Try and get to work for 8 am every day.
- Spend more time with people – don’t avoid my family.
- Sort out my finances
- Drink more water
- Get back on my bike